So I was having a mini-marathon of Batman Beyond and I got toRats.
And now I’m all: LET’S TAKE A MINUTE TO APPRECIATE THE BAMF THAT IS DANA TAN.
She gets stalked and kidnapped by the fantastically obsessive Ratboy, who looks like the unholy mutant spawn of the Phantom of the Opera and the Pied Piper of Hamelin and controls giant fucking rats.
Does Dana let this slide? FUCK NO.
She’s not awake more than a few minutes and she’s already scheming how to get the fuck out of crazytown. Fuck that Beauty and the Beast bullshit, she just got kidnapped in her best “come fuck me” dress by Ratboy and his R.O.U.S.s and his creeper ass wants her to stay FOREVER. This shit will not stand.
So she arranges for him and his mutant vermin to get the fuck out on a senseless, time consuming, attention grabbing errand, finds a flashlight and gets the fuck out of dodge. And this bitch does it in fucking heels. You ever walked on a pipe in heels? That shit’s hard. Dana fucking Tan does it.
And she may be grossed out by the fucking rats and the water, but FUCK if there’s a way out, she’s fucking taking it because FUCK RATBOY, she’s just not into you and she’s not going to be your waifu.
Oh yeah, so she miscalculates and slips and nearly gets Zerg-rushed by rats because hey she has to be back at the evil lair for an evil reveal/stall for Terry’s entrance/Bond Villain speech, but when the shit gets tough and Batman drops in, does she run off to a corner or flail helplessly?
She picks up a hockey stick, ties a teddy bear to it, lights it on fire and proceeds to beat the shit out of the rats attacking Batman LIKE A BOSS.
This girl don’t mess around.
Then again, considering how often her high school gets attacked/overrun by strange occurrences/friends get brainwashed or crazy, she’s got no time for this Phantom of the Opera bullshit.
And Ratboy is no Gerard Butler.